Editor, The News:

I awakened this morning feeling busted, disgusted and can’t even be trusted.

I’m tired of being the “have nots.” The devil in me hatched a brilliant plan to take from the “haves” and I would no longer be a “have not.”

I hid in the shadows of a back alley. Here comes my “have.” I pulled out what appeared to be a gun. Startled, the man whipped out what appeared to be a “phone.” He called the police, said I was acting arrogant as in numbskull, and to have me removed as a nuisance. I left without incident.

Later that day I laid eyes on the most beautiful babe I’ve ever seen. I kindly asked her for the time of day. She immediately shouted some obscenity I’ve heard before. She said she wouldn’t give me the time of day even if I had the damn watch. Once again, I left without incident.

Later on, my world (for ever it’s worth) collapsed. I discovered I was on the FBI’s top 10 least wanted list, nonetheless in last place.

What I wouldn’t give (for ever it’s worth) to speak to Rodney Dangerfield.

Robert A. Zilinski

South Mercer Street

New Castle

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