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April 25, 2014

Gary Church: Need a hug? Be sure it’s not a moment of truth

NEW CASTLE — In days of old, I always bought something new and fashionable to wear for Easter.

I no longer participate in this custom.

My wife still believes in it, although I can't tell the difference between last years’ outfit and this year’s.

In my arsenal of clothes, there is a pink shirt that Kayleen Cubbal pressured me to wear for The News during a special breast cancer week appearance.

I figured I'd get it out of storage, and wear it. No one else at church had ever seen it. They might think I broke down and finally spent my First Holy Communion money.

People must have thought that I looked just like an Easter egg. Maybe a cracked one, but at least I was pretty.

Several young damsels came up and hugged me, and commented on my shirt.

Hugs are one of the things in life I really enjoy getting.

If you want to increase getting hugs, I learned a trick from the ol' TV repairman, Mr. McGrath.

One Sunday, several of us walked into a restaurant, where he was eating with a group of friends.

He mentioned to one of the lovely ladies with us that it was his birthday.

She gave him a hug, and wished him Happy Birthday.

Unfortunately, his wife spilled the beans — it was not his birthday.

I thought, "This is a great way to increase getting hugged."

So if you are in need of a hug, my advice is either get a pink shirt to wear on Easter, or tell someone it's your birthday.

When I was a little kid, if we said something with our fingers crossed, it didn't count as a lie.

Just be sure and cross them.

No one will know the difference, except maybe your wife, who I'm sure will let them know that it was a con job.

But by that time, it's too late, and you got your hug.


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