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June 22, 2013

Josh Drespling: Sorry, honey, I am not a crook — just a forgetful daddy

NEW CASTLE — I feel so awful and embarrassed. I have been committing a dastardly deed without even knowing it.

My lack of attention to detail and forgetfulness has led me down this reprehensible path. It was an honest mistake and I truly feel terrible for it. Nonetheless, I have become a crook and a malefactor.

Over the past several years I have been using my PCN checking account to launder the bounty of my daughter's birthday money. She has her own savings account, but it is through an online institution that pays her a far greater interest rate than any local brick and mortar establishment. Because of this arrangement, I have to electronically transfer the funds to her account from another active account.

I use my account to deposit the checks and cash from grandmas, aunts and other generous relatives. I'm usually quite prudent with these funds and make certain that they get transferred to her account once all the checks clear.

Last week I was going over my accounts for the past few months and I noticed I had around $150 in extraneous funds. The only plausible explanation was that several of her birthday checks never got moved to her account. I must have forgotten to move the money from one account to the other. Her birthday was in April and here we sit in the middle of June, nearly 90 days removed from the birthday festivities, and I am still holding her money like some mean old banker.

My accounting error was conveniently in my favor as I had inadvertently held her money captive for months. I had exploited her money and had actually used it to pay bills and get gas several times. Knowing that I had used her money for our expenses just heaped on the guilt for my transgressions. As soon as I realized the error of my ways, I transferred her money into her account along with a little extra to help cover the remorse I felt for stealing her money.

I'm thankful that she doesn’t understand the finer points of banking and would never hold a grudge against her dear ol’ daddy for a simple accounting oversight. I guess I'm lucky that we are not part of a big time Mafioso family or I may have ended up sleeping with the fishes for such and infraction.


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