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July 27, 2013

Josh Drespling: Ooh, yuk! I just couldn’t reveal a nasty secret — was I wrong?

NEW CASTLE — I was told I was a horrible person. Although it was a playful jab, I felt bad for doing what I did.

I'm about to unfold a tale for you, and I swear that every word is true. Your job is to weigh both sides of the story and carefully examine the facts to determine if, in fact, I am a terrible person for my actions (or lack thereof).

On the day in question, I glanced across my workplace and there was one of the younger girls who works with me, standing in her usual spot. In her hand, she held an open bag of Combos. You know those delicious, cheese-filled pretzel snacks.

She motioned with the international sign for, “Do you want some,” while chewing the few pieces she had just popped into her mouth. As she held the bag up and pointed it in my direction, I thought that some of that salty goodness would help take the edge off the day’s stress and go well with my carbonated beverage.

I began to walk toward her to receive my vittles when I was suddenly stopped dead in my tracks. Another employee had swooped in and crammed his bear claw of a hand into the bag of combos. He pulled out a handful and began shoving them into his mouth. At that moment, I suddenly lost my appetite and any desire to ever eat Combos again.

You may ask yourself why I was so appalled with his actions. Please allow me to explain. No more than 10 minutes before this Combos exchange transpired, I was in the restroom. I was washing my hands and admiring my dapper self in the mirror, when I noticed that someone was in the stall next to me.  

I heard the rumblings and grumblings of a man doing his business. Then I heard the toilet flush. Soon the door to the stall flung open, pushing a wave of stench past my nostrils. The employee who was soon to be the “Combos Culprit” emerged from the stall and quickly moved past me.

He avoided all contact with the sink and didn’t even bother to acknowledge that I was there. Yes, I said he avoided the sink like it was a plague of magnificent proportions. Leaving behind whatever residual effects his actions in the stall may have had on his hands.

Fast-forward 10 minutes and his infected hand is rummaging through this poor girl's bag of Combos. I was aghast and speechless as she reached in after him and proceeded to toss a few into her mouth.

With her mouth half full, she mumbled “Do you want some?”  I stammered to respond with, “Ah, no thanks.”  

I felt some level of responsibility to tell her what had just transpired, but how do you breach such a subject? A bit of time passed and the other employee was still hanging around, so I never had the chance to tell this poor girl. I felt even worse as we were preparing to go home for the night and I noticed the empty Combos bag in the trash can over in her area.

Several weeks passed and she eventually found out about the “Combos Incident.” She playfully accused me of being a horrible person for not telling her and saving her from the possible contamination. She explained that she thought we were friends and told me how she would have told me if the situation was reversed. I truly felt bad, but I was dumbfounded and speechless at the time. I froze like a deer in the headlights.

We have laughed about the entire situation over and over, but for some reason I still cannot bring myself to eat Combos.


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