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July 19, 2013

Gary Church: Maybe I can’t outrun a tornado, but I can still make a splash

NEW CASTLE — It has been said that patience is a virtue.

I don't possess that virtue.

This creates a small problem from time to time, because I am not married to Speedy Gonzalez.

When I take her to Walmart or Giant Eagle and have to wait in the car, I can grow a small beard.

Last Wednesday, she left the house before 4 p.m. to get a takeout for supper at Giant Eagle.

At 4:15 p.m., the weather took a turn for the worse.

As I listened to the police scanner, I heard a fireman in the Moravia area say that he had spotted a tornado.

He mentioned there was some major damage.

Being a little nuts, I went outside with my camera, just in case one came my way. I thought I could snap the photo just before it swept me up.

While I was outside, The News called and asked, "When the storm is over, would you go take some photos?"

I figured as soon as Mrs. Church gets home with the goodies, I would chug down the food and leave.

At 4:30, she wasn't home yet.

I started pacing the floor, waiting for her to get home with the goodies.

Finally, at 4:50 p.m., she called and said not to worry — she was OK.

I wasn't worrying, I was hungry and wanted to get to work.

Then she hit me with the reason she wasn't home yet.

While at Giant Eagle, when they heard the tornado warnings, they put everyone in the produce cooler, including my wife.

She finally made it home safely around 5 p.m., with a slight broccoli aroma on her.

I ate, and left for the photo shoot.

By the time I got there, every TV station I could think of was on the scene.

They must have beaten me because their wives weren't standing in a cooler at a grocery store.

Luckily, no one was injured in the storm.

There might have been some upset TV crews because I splashed pretty good when I hit a puddle.

They'll never know who it was, because I just kept on going, when I saw what I did.

Sometimes, my speed comes in handy.


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