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April 19, 2013

Gary Church: Blindfolded taste-testers? Ha, what a bunch of weenies!

NEW CASTLE — New Castle people are sure passionate about their hot dogs.

If you ever want to get comments on your Facebook page, just bring up that subject.

I read an article on Yahoo News that said Nathan’s All-Beef hot dogs won a blindfolded taste test.

I'm not sure why they wore blindfolds.

I don't think any company engraves its name on their wieners.

On my suggestion, my wife bought a pack, and we had them for supper.

The first problem came when my wife announced that the wieners would not burn.

I don't eat hot dogs unless they have a few burn stripes on them.

That must be written in the Bible somewhere.

I had to take over as the weenie watcher, to show her how to burn them.

They still wouldn't burn.

That was strike one.

Then came the first bite.

It was juicy.

That made strike two. I don't care for juicy wieners. They just don't seem cooked enough when they are wet inside.

Then came the final test — tasting them.

Strike three!

I can't say that I have ever met a hot dog that I didn't like, until that bite.

I managed to eat one and a half hot dogs, but that was it.

My wife had trouble downing one of them.

I would like to invite the wiener testers who decided that Nathan’s hot dogs were so delicious to come to the hot dog capital of the world, New Castle, Pa.

Coney Island, Bill’s or P.O. Lunch, it doesn't matter which hot dog shop they visit. They are all far superior than that thing Yahoo said was so great.

They won't have to wear blindfolds either.

No matter where my Facebook friends live now, anyone raised in our area still says New Castle has the best hot dogs.

Just ask your reunion attendees, "Where was the first place you stopped when you got to town?"

I'm old enough to remember when TV's Old Gold Cigarette pitchman Dennis James had Coney Island chili shipped to him in California.

Bring on those blindfolded Yahoo taste testers.

We'll show you what a real hot dog is suppose to taste like.

 

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