NEW CASTLE —
“You like me, you really like me.” — Actress Sally Field, during her Oscar acceptance speech in 1985
Rewind to Brad Stevens, 2011.
Led tiny Butler to the NCAA final game for a second straight year. Asked to speak at clinics everywhere. On top of the world.
So was Sean Miller. Led Arizona back to national prominence with an appearance in the Elite Eight. Courted by Maryland and turned down millions to coach the Terrapins. Fans in the desert were ecstatic when he chose to stay home to lead the Wildcats for the next decade.
Fast-forward to 2012.
Stevens and Butler are heading to the NIT.
Arizona and Miller might be tagging along.
With every loss this season, their approval rating has dropped more than anyone not named “Bobby Brown” or “Kardashian.”
Doesn’t matter.
They are who they are. And they will continue to coach the only way they know how.
With passion. Commitment. Energy. And concern for their players.
Despite what you think.
Despite how many “friends” like their Facebook pages.
Despite how many people follow them on Twitter.
We would all be wise to heed their example.
You know, I love ESPN. It’s sort of the National Enquirer for sports fans.
And sometimes I really, really hate ESPN. Because, you know, it’s sort of the National Enquirer for sports fans.
When it isn’t airing live events — which is about 20 hours a day during the week — the network’s time slots are filled with sarcastic guys in suits questioning coaches and players.
That is, when they aren’t showing the Top 10 dunks of the day. (Sarcasm intended).
Here are just a couple of “hot topics” discussed by the experts over the past few days ...
•Should LeBron start taking the last shot in games because people want him to? Or should he continue to make the right basketball play?
•Is (fill in the blank’s) status falling, even though there’s still nearly two months left until the NFL Draft?
•Who are the last four in and the first four out of the NCAA Tournament?
So you’re telling me if I’m a college coach I should hope that a talking head in Bristol — who’s never seen my team play in person, by the way — is now calling us overrated because we’ve lost five games? Even though he placed us in the preseason Top 10 because he thought it would be chic to go so far out on a limb?
Really? I want THAT guy to say good things about me?
Yep, pretty much. It’s called human approval.
“There is nothing more exhausting than trying to gain the approval of people who are created by the same God who is in love with you.” — Lou Giglio
And we can’t help it. We all crave it. Yet we would be so much better off without it.
In a recent blog, Ray Ortlund offered four reasons why it’s foolish and meaningless to chase it.
1. Human approval is divided. Some like you, others dislike you. A split vote. Who can you believe?
2. Human approval is shallow. None of them know your deepest heart. What if they did?
3. Human approval is distorted. Your friends overlook many failings. Your enemies can’t see anything right with you. How do you sort it all out?
4. Human approval is unsatisfying. The need of your heart for belovedness goes far beyond anything another person can say or do.
Another word for human approval is “opinion.” And how many of those have you had just TODAY?
Then again, if we’re completely transparent, most of our decisions in life are based on two precepts:
•What will people say?
•What will people think?
“Most people are other people,” Oscar Wilde famously stated. “Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.”
So coaches, when those thoughts enter our minds, we would all be wise to hit the “Ignore” button.
What “they” say and what “they” think will change with every win — and loss.
I’ve heard it said often and I truly believe it: Good coaches use only what they can teach and use only what they believe in.
So if you’re a youth, high school or college coach, here’s another way to spin that phrase: If you can’t teach it, toss it. If you don’t believe in it, don’t share it with your players.
Sometimes that leads to title opportunities. Sometimes it leads to the unemployment line.
But it always leads to being a true winner.
Even if the scoreboard — or the guys on ESPN — tell you otherwise.
Tim Kolodziej
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