New Castle News

August 21, 2012

Gary Church: Pants on the ground, pants on the ground ... lookin’ like a fool with my pants on the ground

Gary Church
New Castle News

NEW CASTLE — Sometimes I can be a little behind in what's happening around the world.

If it isn't in the New Castle News or headlines on my Yahoo page, I have no idea what is going on.

Since I am on scanner duty a lot for The News, I do know what is going on with the police and fire calls in town.

Just recently, the police were called to Mr. Pizza's parking lot, because a man was walking around with his pants down.

Thankfully, he was gone when the police arrived and I wasn't called to takes photos.

When I posted this on Facebook, cousin Barb asked if it was Randy Travis.

I didn't have a clue what she was talking about, but I soon found out.

To put you all at ease, I can't think of any condition I would be in, that I would go into a store naked, and order two packs of cigarettes.

I don't smoke.

I will have to plead guilty about the pants down thing, though.

While carrying a very heavy TV set to the garage, all of a sudden I felt very cool from my waist down.

There was no way I could let go of the TV and pull up my pants, so I had to continue on, with my pants on the ground.

As far as I know, no neighbor spotted the blessed event, but my wife did.

Let's just say she got very amused and made a mad dash for the bathroom.

I'm not sure if she made it or not.

No one ever thinks about the poor guy trying to carry a heavy TV, and can only take baby steps.

After a long trek, I finally made it to the garage, but there might have been some gravel in my pants.

To ensure the neighbors’ safety from seeing this happening again, I no longer carry anything that weighs over two pounds.

So, how much do you think a 'Mr. Pizza' pizza might weigh?