New Castle News

Gary Church

February 12, 2013

Gary Church: I can only hope the ‘not-so-hairy Gary’ jokes won’t have legs

NEW CASTLE — Since dress is very casual at choir practice, on warm days, I wear shorts.

As I was passing by the ladies section, Amy the alto said to me, "You don't have any hair on your legs."

I looked down, and sure enough, she was right.

There use to be hair there. I wonder where it went?

If I have been shedding, there are no signs of it on the furniture, like my dog leaves.

My wife doesn't have to use the pet hair attachment when vacuuming my chair.

The hair must have abandoned ship, one strand at a time.

When the ladies in the soprano section heard the remark about my hairless legs, they all wanted to trade me legs.

They must be a hairy bunch.

Just to show Amy the alto I still had hair on my body, I lowered the neck of my shirt, revealing my vast array of chest hair.

I was going to show her the hair on my back, but her head was buried in her choir folder screaming, "NO, NO!"

Does Rogaine work on legs?

Maybe a hair transplant from my chest might be needed.

No one but Amy the alto has mentioned my legs being hairless.

I guess I should just start wearing long pants to choir practice, or avoid walking in front of those wild and crazy altos.


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Gary Church
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