New Castle News

Gary Church

June 24, 2014

Gary Church: Hey, ladies! A coffee break with Emeril will perk up your husband

NEW CASTLE — If it hasn't happened by now, it's not going to happen.

Six months ago, I purchased a Keurig coffee maker as a Christmas present for my wife.

We could not wait to try all the flavors that were available as K-cups.

After six months of trying everything, I've come to realize that the Keurig makes horrible coffee.

Yes, I've tried the light roasts, the dark roasts, the bold roasts, Dunkin Donuts, Donut Shop, Maxwell House, Breakfast Blends, plus stuff from Aldi's, and have not enjoyed any of them.

My Bunn coffee maker, with Maxwell House coffee, suits me just fine.

I'm not going to throw the Keurig away. I'm just changing my reason for using it.

I've found that the Emeril Extra Bold K-cup is the worst tasting coffee ever.

A few weeks ago, I had some yard chores that needed to be done, which I didn't want to do.

Since no one was drinking the coffee, and we had plenty available, I thought I would try it, to see if it gave me an extra boost.

Holding my nose, I was able to down it.

A few minutes later, I was pruning limbs off a fallen tree, mowing the lawn, planting some plants, and even asked my wife if she wanted to go dancing.

They should call that stuff atomic adrenalin.

Ladies, if you need a few chores done around the house, and would like your husband to take you mountain climbing, slip him a cup of Emeril's Extra Bold coffee, and then hold on.

You will be amazed at the results, and to top it off, it's legal.

Just be sure to place a clothes pin on his nose before serving.


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Gary Church
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