New Castle News

All About You ...

September 13, 2012

Lori Brothers: Nurture resiliency to face adversity

NEW CASTLE — What you choose in feelings, thoughts and actions can shape a positive perspective about yourself and develop coping skills, which lead to resilience.

Resiliency is a new area of research in preventive health. It is the skill of being able to adapt to life’s misfortunes. It has a positive impact on your health and sense of well-being.

“Selful” is a word used to replace “selfish.” It is a heart-based attitude you can live by, and activate when you are coping with life demands. You treat yourself much kinder. You are aware that you are going through a hard time. You do something about it by admitting it to yourself, and take action to practice self care.

During times of adversity, it is common to let your own personal care slack. Even if you feel awful about what you are dealing with, do your best to focus on eating healthy foods, getting enough rest and exercise, and practice stress management to find your peace and calm in the storm. This is all inner- and outer-strength building.

Listen to relaxing music, or any music that you really enjoy — sing your heart out. Practice contemplative prayer. Find a peaceful place to restore and rejuvenate. Convert television time to workout time, either by walking or heading to the gym. At first, you may feel overwhelmed or exhausted. However, just a little motivation can be restorative to your viewpoint and boost your coping skills.

Everyone has their own way of dealing with the unexpected. Whether big or small setbacks bring hardship, or leave you dealing with the unknown, do you tend to bounce back? Do you fall apart?  Either way, you can assess the situation and choose resiliency habits.

People who develop inner strength tend to be more adaptable and flexible. They tend to be more stress hardy, which allows them to meet the demands of change.

Inner strength develops hope. Seeking joy, and feeling enjoyment in life despite the problems you face can help you to cope and manage stress.

The feelings that emerge when the unexpected occurs — anger, pain, grief — are the normal reaction when life hands you a lemon. I actually like lemons. However, in life, they’re the metaphor for what we perceive as a bad deal. Over-riding these negative emotional responses helps choose positive action.

When you move away from the self-imposed role of victim, you build inner strength. Know that your health and well-being are worth fighting for, and when you feel low find a friend to laugh with, eat a healthy snack, or head outside for a 20 minute walk.

Reaching out is the healthy response to become resilient through adversity. It is important to access support from others. Cutting yourself off from family, friends, churches or appropriate agencies can put added strain on you emotionally, mentally and physically.

You may not know it at the time of a crisis, but you’re learning something valuable and wise by going through challenging life experiences. Choose a life philosophy that affirms you will learn from your experiences. This can produce positive self-talk, and will also lead you to gratitude for the ups and the downs.

It is important to find purpose during challenging times. Find something that helps you feel a personal sense of accomplishment every day. A pro-active lifestyle leads you to your future. A fearful, sedentary one can keep you stuck.

Once you feel personal satisfaction from doing at least one small thing for yourself, acknowledge the feeling. Good feelings are the fuel you need cope and to look forward to better times ahead.

(Lori Brothers is the director of the Dean Ornish Program for Reversing Heart Disease at Jameson Hospital, www.jamesonhealth.org)

Text Only | Photo Reprints
All About You ...
  • Ramsey.jpg Dave Says: Problems with no credit score?

    “Dave Says” is a weekly column featuring financial advice from nationally syndicated radio host Dave Ramsey. His column is filled with timely, relevant questions and answers taken from actual letters and calls on Ramsey’s radio progam, “The Dave Ramsey Show.”
     

    April 18, 2014 1 Photo

  • Brothers.jpg Lori Brothers: Play with names — not with your food

    Do you remember being told, “don’t play with your food” when you were a child?  Or maybe you’ve said this to your own children or grandchildren. I’ve heard stories about kids slipping food under the table to the dog or stuffing Brussels sprouts into their pockets to get out of the pain of eating them.

    April 17, 2014 1 Photo

  • stright.jpg Sarah Stright-Hartley: A T-shirt dress can be a three for all

    I love finding pieces that can be worn for just about every portion of my life.  From daytime, to work, and then on a date with my husband, I like pieces that can go the distance.

    April 16, 2014 2 Photos

  • ivy_bday.jpg Kali Davies-Anderson: Happy birthday, Miss Ivy!

    This week I would like to take time out of my usual ramblings to wish my second born daughter, Ivy, a very, very happy first birthday!

    April 15, 2014 2 Photos

  • Olszak.jpg Heartbleed raises the stakes on Internet security

    My column last week dealt with Internet and related scams, along with steps people can take to protect themselves. Today’s column could be termed Part 2 of that topic, albeit from a different angle.

    April 14, 2014 1 Photo

  • Hudson.jpg Lugene Hudson: Celebrate Easter like Helen Martin

    What’s cookin? That’s one of our favorite questions at Culinary Conversation. We love when readers share some of their favorites. This week, Helen Martin of New Castle stepped up to the plate to answer that question regarding Easter dinners.

    April 12, 2014 1 Photo

  • Ramsey.jpg Dave Ramsey: You can’t borrow way out of debt

    “Dave Says” is a weekly column featuring financial advice from nationally syndicated radio host Dave Ramsey. His column is filled with timely, relevant questions and answers taken from actual letters and calls on Ramsey’s radio progam, “The Dave Ramsey Show.”
     

    April 11, 2014 1 Photo

  • Brothers.jpg Lori Brothers: Wellness a growing trend among those over 50

    The power of choice that the explosion of Internet information has generated is moving us as a culture in a direction to examine who we are and what we really value.

    April 10, 2014 1 Photo

  • stright.jpg Sarah Stright-Hartley: Some perfect fits for heading back to work

    I'm heading back to work soon and I've really been thinking about my work wardrobe — especially because I'm hoping most of it still fits my post-baby body.

    April 9, 2014 2 Photos

  • Kali.jpg Kali Davies-Anderson: It’s one of those days — and sometimes that’s OK

    Today, I am distracted. I had a long weekend. I am kind of in a bad mood. My daughter is playing with a toy with multiple musical buttons and keeps interrupting the playing song to start it over again.

    April 8, 2014 1 Photo

House Ads
Poll

Are you concerned enough about the Heartbleed bug on the Internet to change all of your social media and website passwords?

Yes. It’s always a good idea to change passwords regularly anyway. I just have so many, I’m not sure where to start.
No. From what I’ve read, companies are still trying to figure out how to fix the flaw. The bad guys will just have access to my NEW passwords, too.
Not sure, but I blame Al Gore. He invented the Internet, right? How’s he going to get us out of this mess?
     View Results